Five ways to (not) get along with a cashier July 20, 2008
Posted by cashierobs in Cashier Observations.Tags: along, belt, better, cashier, conflict, conveyor, five, get, headset, heavy, improve, items, membership, phone, talk, tips, word
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Cashiers got you down? Is it taking a coons age to get from the register to the exit? Just follow these five useful tips to improve the relationship.
- Before approaching the register, be sure to have a membership card ready (if applicable); then throw the card at the cashier before putting items on the conveyor belt. Be sure to look inconvenienced if the cashier asks for a membership when the cart is halfway empty from unloading it.
- Talk on your cell phone or Blue Tooth headset while checking out. To achieve the greatest respect from a cashier, give them only a portion of attention. Cashiers should be happy enough by now that they don’t take advantage of a now semi effective attention span. Finally, purchase a headset so the cashier never knows when they are being spoken to or not.
- Place the largest and heaviest items on the conveyor belt. Since cashiers are always standing in place and never moving, it’s important to consider their exercise needs. Large cases of water or Gatorade can be useful; but toss them onto the conveyor belt to make sure it’s stable and working properly. Placing vacuum cleaners or over sized boxes onto the belt also helps. Don’t forget to add kitty litter and as much dog food as possible and don’t let the cashier use their hand scanner.
- If the cashier isn’t scanning items quickly enough, don’t be afraid to show them who’s boss. If the cashier isn’t up to par with standards, just ask for a new one. A supervisor will be available as soon as they are done assisting all nine underage cashiers with alcohol sales.
- Finally and most importantly: don’t say a word. Ever. Remember, cashiers are not really people. Most of them are barely literate. In fact, it’s probably a good thing by not saying a single word or acknowledging them. Just give them the grocery items, pay for it, and walk away.
Thanks! Be sure to check in for more great tips!
-Disclaimer-
Most customers at my register do not act like this. I can go an entire day without having one of the asses featured above. But when one does appear, it can be either comical or can ruin what was potentially a fine day for a cashier.
Totally agree. I work at cash currently. Absolutely hate it. The power trips most people indulge in at the check out were absolutely astonishing to me when I first started- and now they have become routine. I have horrible lower back pain which never seems to subside and which started about a week or two after I began at cash I understand that I do not make nearly as much as you do in your office job but that does not make me beneath you or deserving of verbal assault. While not all customers are gigantic assholes, some are. From blabbing on their cell phone about their new jogging outfit or gossiping about trite and grating things, paying just enough attention to notice we had already bagged 3/4 of their purchases in plastic and then being outraged at the bagger (if the company even bothered to schedule one that shift) and myself because we didn’t use our x-ray vision to see that you had canvas bags inside their purse to not responding to anything we say and stomping out pathetically oozing their feelings of superiority. I’m about thirty years younger than you, sir. Obviously you are making a more substantial income. It’s really not rocket science.
Anyways you nailed most of my top rants. Best of luck.
[...] appropriate order (and timely fashion, of course), I present you the opposite spectrum of my “Five ways to (not) get along with a cashier” [...]
This was awesome! I’ve worked retail for two years (albeit at a bookstore) and routinely have to witness a litany of rude behavior. About books!
And I absolutely LOVE the Bluetooth headsets and people who refuse to stop their personal conversations so I can, you know, actually check them out at work. So when the customer is speaking and I don’t understand what they’re saying, I respond with a simple, polite, “Excuse me?” The quick, snappy and clever response I get back is: “I wasn’t talking to you.”
Oh, really? You weren’t talking to me — the live person standing directly in front of you and trying to complete your business transaction?
Ah, the brave world of the retail employee….
Stay strong, brave soul.
Don’t be afraid to slap them around a little if you need to.
I hate it when people decide its okay to stay in the store after its closed. The five minute warning i give you over the PA is your chance to bring all of your crap to the front so i can ring you up and the get the hell out of the store so i can sit down for the first time in 5 hours. When i come over the PA and say that its 10:00 and we are closing, that’s your warning that in about 15 seconds, i’m going to hunt you down and throw you through the glass door that my manager has already locked.
[...] wish to share? Some links: Not Always Right – Funny and stupid customer quotes. One of my dailies. Five ways NOT go get along with a cashier. Five pet peeves ABOUT cashiers. Categories: General, None, Personal, Ra(ve)nt Tags: Peeves, [...]